Sometimes I get this feeling that the general consensus is that accepting things as they are is a total cop-out. An act of complacency left for those who are too damn lazy to actually make shit happen.
I’ve read a few articles lately reinforcing this, saying how “It is what it is” (or other iterations of the saying) are just excuses, and proof of the apathy in our culture. But I’m not so sure.
That saying is basically a family mantra. Particularly at the summer cabin I grew up in – where the slat walls have holes to the outdoors, the kitchen roof used to leak if it rained too hard, and the old motor boat (R.I.P.) was known for leaving us stranded in the middle of the lake with two mismatching oars to row us home.
“It is what is,” we say with a chuckle and move the bucket an inch to the right, aiming to catch a few more rain drops.
And we love it. Every creaky floor board, every hole in the wall, even the massive boulder that used to lean against the house literally pushing the cabin into the water.
We’ve accepted that it sure as shit ain’t perfect, but we love it. Because it’s home.
But what about another home? You know, your body? The one you walk around in all day, every day, generally hating on and refusing to accept it for what it is, because it is so not what it’s “supposed to be.” And you know that if you could change that one damn thing, then everything would be perfect.
See, I’m proposing a shift.
A mind-shift away from refusing to accept the one body you’ve been given as something more than a hunk of junk that needs constant “improvement.” A shift towards realizing acceptance just might be the key to real change after all.
Acceptance as a way of showing that all that is - the moments, choices and actions that led to things as they currently are, are all exactly what needed to happen. And exactly what needs to be your current reality in order to finally grasp some appreciation, some gratitude, some OUTRIGHT LOVE for all that is.
What if instead, this acceptance, this weird foreign act of SELF LOVE was a catalyst? What if finally laying down your weapons in the war against your body created space for change, instead of DEMANDING change?
Some pretty crazy things just might start to happen to that home of yours.
Instead of agonizing over arms that are never thin enough, what if that acceptance created time for a regular yoga practice – a way to exercise without hating every damn minute of it. And then, all of a sudden those arms you were so desperately wishing away, suddenly were capable of holding you upside down in a headstand like it ain’t no thang??
Those hours spent poking & prodding at bits of flesh, willing them to disappear, could instead be spent exploring, hiking, planning a trip, learning a new language, starting a new business, making new friends. What if??
The cabin on the lake wasn’t exactly “Home & Garden” ready when my parents first bought it 20 years ago. Over the years small tweaks have been made. Slowly but surely it’s becoming more of what my folks had in mind from the beginning. The original run-down cabin though? We loved every inch of it; and as it changes over the years, we only love it more.
“It is what it is” right now, yes. And maybe what is right now isn’t what you’d expected it to be.
But there are a million and one possibilities of what could be, if you can learn to be ok with what is.